


At Home

by rudbeckia



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: M/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-16
Updated: 2015-06-02
Packaged: 2018-03-30 20:55:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3951430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rudbeckia/pseuds/rudbeckia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is a long time since Carlos felt at home.<br/>He has his apartment, his laboratory, his friends.<br/>But there is something missing.</p><p>Can Kevin help?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Building

**Author's Note:**

> There will be no kevcilos here. That is my not3!
> 
> The E rating is for chapter 8.

"You'll be able to visit! Talk soon, I love you."

Carlos ended his call to Cecil's phone. Leaving voice mail was so normal that he never froze over it now. At first he had been awkward, all that time ago, when he called about how time was weird and didn't know what to say without Cecil on the other end of the call to prompt him with questions. Calling to arrange dates was worse. _Umm, Cecil? Can we... uh... dinner? Call me?_ Perhaps that awkwardness was the result of the call being preceded by a missed date or a cancellation because of science.

It was a good thing Cecil was really into science, thought Carlos as he grinned at the pile of building materials and slightly fire-damaged kitchen appliances he had collected from just below the sand surface. Doug and Alicia nearby waved at him. They had good eyes for spotting useful objects. If he used the side of the low, craggy mountain as one of the walls, he probably had enough to build a pretty decent one bedroom apartment. Bedroom, living room, kitchen, bathroom. The kitchen could be outdoors. Carlos smiled. Cecil might like that although Carlos thought he better at least provide indoor coffee-making facilities. He was accustomed to having an outdoor bathroom too but that seemed a tad un-neighborly now he had neighbors. And Cecil would hate that.

The band of wandering people from Night Vale, old residents of the town Carlos thought was his home until he was prevented from returning, had set down their reclaimed materials, looked at each other and shrugged. Here would do. Discarded bricks and cinder blocks, lengths of tubing, half-used bags of cement, tarps, junk. Their new homes were planned out. Neighbors-to-be agreed to stake claim to plots and stay within their chosen boundaries, marked out with colored rocks. 

Carlos signalled to Dave and, with the help of Alicia's dog and a hastily constructed sled, they transferred Carlos's materials to the upright rock face and Carlos began to build his home a little way from the main building area. It was a slow, painstaking process to fit the materials together neatly and he camped nearby until he had the first room completed. 

The dog park. Carlos laughed and shook his head whenever he thought about it. He should have known, should have worked it out. Dana went into the dog park, through the house that did not exist and out into the desert. He could have worked backwards and figured out where he must be. The doors were gone and the house in Night Vale was probably just a house again, but the dog park was still exactly where it should be. He had been to try to find the gates but the towering obsidian walls forming the perimeter stretched on and on in both directions for as far as he could walk, without a corner or a hint of a curve to suggest a finite dimension.

Carlos played with the idea of asking Doug and Alicia to carry him as far as they were willing, to help him investigate the spacetime of the desert. Find out, if he walked far enough in one direction away from the buildings sprouting from the sand, would he find himself walking back in from the opposite direction? Did his straight line form a curve a little like the equator where if you travel west for long enough you eventually end up approaching your start from the east? He had done science on the other side of those walls and warned people to stay back. Carlos looked over at the growing buildings and people milling around or industrious, making progress on their new homes. For once he was glad people had not taken his advice.

Carlos called Cecil again. Just hearing his voice was enough to persuade Carlos to stay where he was, build his new home and wait for Cecil to come and stay in it. Carlos did not mention his desire to explore. Instead he chatted about ways Cecil could get time off, asked how long it might be before he could visit, how much vacation time would he be allowed. 

All over town, for that was what the area was fast becoming, houses and business premises and even a school (to the utter disgust of a couple of the children) went up slowly but securely. As citizens finished their own homes, they joined forces to make leisure facilities. A boardwalk. An ice cream shop. A rollercoaster. A little pleasure beach by no sea. Pleasant, calm places to exist.

Except for the rollercoaster. Someone hadn't planned that well at all, but as that someone was currently screaming through their nine thousand, four hundred and twenty third corkscrew loop, nobody held it against them. Carlos, invited to teach science once or twice a week, even took his little class out to listen, measure the frequency shift of the scream and use the doppler effect to calculate the speed of the screaming wannabe-imagineer. He was sure the rollercoaster violated some or other of the laws of physics, but the laws of physics here in the desert seemed to manifest more as general guidelines than firm fact.

Standing back to survey his progress on his new abode, slowed by the absence of Doug and Alisha who insisted there was a battle to win somewhere, Carlos felt almost at home. He sat on the sand, smiling at the low building that backed onto the mountain and wondered what Cecil would say. Carlos giggled as he imagined his boyfriend's voice. _Mountains aren't real, silly!_ or _Why does your room have a wall made of nothing?_ probably.

Carlos stood up. He needed more building materials and he needed help to carry them. A voice spoke his name behind him and a hand lightly tapped his shoulder. It took him a moment to place the familiar voice. Recognition punched him as he turned to see a face that looked almost but not quite like Cecil's but with deep black void where eyes should be. Carlos yelled and jumped back.

He was not smiling.


	2. Neighbors

Kevin stepped back.  
"Hey friend! You remember me!" He smiled, showing teeth that made Carlos want to drag his gaze away. "I am here to help! Don't be frightened of little old me!"  
Carlos almost growled. "Kevin. Why are you here? I swear, if Cecil had ever introduced us I would have..."  
Kevin's heaving breaths decelerated Carlos's rant. Carlos scowled, wondering if Kevin was about to expire on the sand right there and briefly thought about where to bury him.  
"Oh! Oh dear. You are so precious! No wonder he kept you from me way back then. I would have loved to have met you in my Greater Desert Bluffs days!" Kevin's face snapped back to his resting smile, lips puckered at the corners and faint coppery-pink scars pulling upwards like wire. "But I have changed, Carlos. I am not the person I was. Who among us is the same as they were last year? Last week? Yesterday, even?"

Carlos did not move. He relaxed his angry scowl just a fraction.  
"Why would I trust you? You hurt Cecil. You hurt Night Vale. Cecil told me--"  
Kevin nodded. "And we know how impartial Cecil is, when he report events. We know how truthfully he communicates facts. Go on," Kevin's grin returned. "Tell me what Cecil told you about me."

Kevin sat on the pile of bricks by Carlos's new home and listened. Kevin smiled and remained silent, unmoving. Carlos paced and gesticulated as he lectured Kevin on his evil. Carlos spoke, shouted and ranted at Kevin until he was spent and exhausted. Kevin stood.  
"Sit here, friend." Kevin pointed at the bricks. "You look like you need to rest, recover your good mood. Cecil loved your sense of humor. You know that? I didn't always understand it myself but it made him happy to tell the interns what funny thing you just said and hear them laugh too." Kevin hitched his smile up when it slipped. "He didn't know I listened. I heard so much about you from Cecil, and it turns out he told you almost as much about me!" Kevin sat on the sand by Carlos's feet. "I did most of the things he told you. But I never tried to kill him in the vortex, you remember, the sandstorm when I first found myself alone and confused and afraid in Night Vale. The day I lost my Vanessa I lost myself. It is true we held each other tightly out of fear. Perhaps his fear altered his memory. Does Cecil have a good memory, Carlos?"

Carlos scowled at Kevin but said nothing.  
"It is difficult to keep track of events, after everything that happened!" Kevin flashed a smile up at Carlos. "I remember the vortex and the fear and the sounds..." The smile clouded. "The sounds of my Vanessa... her head smashing the glass of her booth... so long ago now but so clear in my head."  
Carlos shifted a little and stared down at Kevin.  
"And I remember Lauren saying it was for the best because there were plans to move me away and I would be more _productive_ ," he spat the word, "without _ties_."  
Kevin went quiet. Carlos did not break his silence but his face softened a little. He reached into the top pocket of his lab coat and found his sunglasses. Carlos handed the glasses to Kevin who put them on, hiding the sight of those eyes weeping tears from the void itself.

Carlos lost track of how long they sat, Carlos on the brick pile, Kevin snivelling by his feet. Eventually Carlos stood up and Kevin scrambled away as if expecting a kick.  
"I am not going to hurt you, Kevin." Carlos sighed. "I want you to tell me what you remember of Cecil. The truth, as you remember it, however subjective, inaccurate and reinterpreted that might be."  
Kevin dried his face with grubby fingers and smiled.  
"I only ever intended good towards Cecil. He was a Voice like me and if he had agreed to broadcast what he was told, so many good things would have happened!"  
Carlos shook his head. "That's not how I remember those days."  
Kevin brightened his smile. "Then your memory is just as subjective as mine. Our paths rarely crossed, unfortunately. You know what would have been adorable? Co-hosting a show! Me and Cecil! Wouldn't that just be so... so... _neat_? Carlos? Carlos!"

Kevin scrambled up and jogged to catch up with the scientist marching away from him.  
"Wait, did I say something bad?"  
Carlos halted. "Don't say that word."  
"Which one? I want to be your friend, _friend_."  
Carlos shuddered. "Neat. Don't say things are neat."  
"Okay! I will not say... that. Are you going to punish me? Lauren used to--"  
"What!? No!" Carlos frowned at Kevin, faced him properly for the first time. Kevin looked down, head sinking almost to chest, arms hugging his own body, shifting from foot to foot. "I am not going to hurt you. I already said it."  
Kevin took a deep breath.  
"I know what I was, my memory is good enough for that. I am not the same now. I feel... empathy." He turned and smiled wide again. "Thank you so much for the sunglasses. Perhaps when I meet other people now they might not chase me away or throw things."

Carlos closed his eyes, clenched his fists and sighed. "Okay. Okay, Kevin, you can stay for a while until you build your own place. Do you need me to show you how to get started?"  
Kevin laughed, a high pitched wheeze. "That is so kind of you, friend! I can build, I know exactly what I am going to build for myself and for anyone else who wants to use it. Cecil will just adore it when he visits. I'm going to build a... No. No, you can have a surprise too. Oh this is so nea... so _wonderful_!"  
Carlos folded his arms as he watched Kevin jig around on his toes and clap his hands. "Fine. Kevin, I am going to sleep for a while. When I wake up I am going to build another room for my home. I have enough materials gathered for that already. You can use my shelter if you want to rest."  
Kevin shook his head. "No, I am way excited, too excited for sleep. I will be productive! I will start building. Right _here_." He pointed at his feet with both hands. "Neighbor!"  
"Suit yourself. The best materials are near the obsidian wall right over there." Carlos pointed with an arm. "Try not to make too much noise." He walked away, watched by Kevin until he was safely inside his completed room.

Some time later Carlos woke feeling as if he had slept maybe five hours. Enough to ease his grumpiness but not enough to feel properly rested. He went out of his bedroom into the roofless shell of his living room to make coffee at the open fireplace. He smiled. Cecil would hate how he had started to cut corners in the coffee making ritual! Perhaps on his next salvage expedition he would look for a coffee-hammer. And more coffee. Now people knew where they were, care packages arrived often and their contents were strategically bartered. Occasionally a stray, unlabelled parcel would be taken and shared but more and more sailed over the wall complete with address labels. Carlos had only ever taken one. It was addressed to Dana and contained beef jerky which he exchanged for coffee, and nachos which he ate on the way back from his salvage trip.

Carlos stretched, scratched and wandered out of the unfinished doorway. He stared. A discreet distance from his home stood the beginnings of a plain rectangular building, its unfinished roof covered by a bright blue tarpaulin. Carlos raised his eyebrows, impressed by Kevin's progress.  
"Progress," he muttered to himself. "Time I got to work."  
Carlos turned and frowned at the spot where he was sure he had left his stash of scrap and salvaged materials. There was only a patch of disturbed sand. Carlos scowled and swore. He stomped off towards Kevin's construction site.

Kevin met him at the entrance and greeted him with a grin and the offer of a hug. Carlos sidestepped the physical contact.  
"Carlos, friend, neighbor! Good morning sleepyhead! I have been so busy, so productive! Welcome, come in, come in and see." Kevin beamed. Carlos took in Kevin's euphoria, his electronics project on the wooden table Carlos had been saving for his kitchen, the solar cells Carlos had gathered and wired together to power his own electrical equipment, and he understood. Carlos's anger evaporated. He did not quite smile, but his scowl lifted.  
"Kevin, I see what you are planning. You should not have stolen from me but you needed all those materials too, didn't you?"  
Kevin laughed and paced inside his building. "Yes! Oh Carlos I knew you would like it. You do like it, don't you? It is not just for me. It is for anyone who wants to use it. Do you think Cecil will like it?"

Carlos willed his lips not to twitch upwards at the thought of Cecil sitting at that wooden table, transmitter mast above, blabbering happily into a microphone. He tried not to imagine Cecil finishing a broadcast, handing over to Kevin or whoever else wanted to talk to the community, coming home to... Carlos realised he was grinning.  
"Kevin, lets both go find more building materials. I can help you here if you want to get your radio station built in time for Cecil's visit but I need my own place finished too. With both of us, that shouldn't take long at all."  
Kevin laughed and clapped his hands.  
"That sounds like fun!"


	3. Seeing the light

Carlos and Kevin trawled the strip of desert within throwing distance of the high wall for useful materials. They loaded Carlos's makeshift sled and took a rope each to drag it back to their site. Carlos insisted they finish his home first before resuming work on Kevin's radio station. Kevin was not happy about this arrangement but recognised that without Carlos, and science, he would struggle to complete it at all. He knew what the mixing table should look like but not how to make it turn the things he whispered to his microphone into waves that littered his voice over space and time.

Still, he resented the waste of time and planned ways of making Carlos see sense.

First he tried persuasion. "Hey neighbour!" he called over, grinning as Carlos struggled to unearth an old wooden door, pine not oak, and load it onto the sled. "Which do you think Cecil would find more impressive, a working radio station, complete with transmitter tower and electricals and maybe even an intern, or a little house backing on to a stupid mountain?"

Carlos smiled and shrugged. "I really don't know, Kevin. I want Cecil to have somewhere nice to stay when he visits so that he might like to come back. Perhaps we can show him a working radio station on his second vacation here."  
The reply threw Kevin. The grin slid off his face. "Oh, Oh dear friend! You mean after Cecil arrives and sees your home and my radio station and this wonderful little town he might want to _leave_?" Kevin clutched at his heart in mock sorrow then he renewed his smile. "Oh no, no. He will surely stay forever if his radio show can broadcast from here! Imagine if Cecil returns and is refused vacation time for a second visit? No, no, Carlos, we... you must persuade him to stay with us... with you. Here. Forever."

Carlos frowned but Kevin smiled and laughed. "You do want him here? Living with us in our new town? That would be so much fun!"  
Carlos still frowned. "Yes, of course I want to be with Cecil. I want him to visit again and again. I want him to come over for weekends if he can cut down on travel time and I--"  
"Then give him a reason, oh please excuse my rudeness! A second reason to come. Build him a radio station! With me!"  
Carlos shook his head. "Kevin, we agreed to finish my place first then we can both work on yours. I have to make sure he has a roof over his head first."  
They dragged their load back in silence.

Second, Kevin tried sabotage.  
Carlos dodged part of a wall built by Kevin that collapsed as he passed and had to be rebuilt with his supervision. He cried out and jumped back, pushing Kevin to the floor under him, shielding him from the falling bricks. Once his pulse and breathing recovered from the sudden unexpected activity, Carlos made Kevin sit outside with him, out of danger from further mishap.  
"Kevin, I thought you knew how to construct walls safely," Carlos explained after halting the build, "I am sorry I put you in danger by carelessly taking you at your word instead of making sure you really knew what you were doing. Let me show you once we have had coffee. Sorry it's probably not up to your usual standard, I know Cecil is very picky about his coffee but--"  
"I'm fine," curt, but Kevin regained his cheerful demeanour quickly. "I mean, thank you so much for saving me, dear friend. Are you injured?" Carlos smiled and shook his head. "Good! Perhaps we should take a break from here and work on the radio station for the rest of the day. You can show me how to make best use of all our reclaimed materials? Scientifically? Yes?"  
Carlos shook his head. "No, we should rebuild that wall together then get the roof on. After that there are the electrics and plumbing to finish. Once that's done we can finish your radio station, like we agreed," Carlos smiled, " _friend_."

Kevin tried fixing the wiring so Carlos got an electric shock every time he touched the plumbing, and was rewarded with a careful, patient lesson on wiring and safe plumbing practices. No matter what he did to put Carlos off, the scientist sighed, shook his head, smiled and showed him how to put it right. Eventually Carlos sat him down and laughed.  
"You know, Kevin? It's a good thing we took our time over building my place first. You said you knew how to build but you really didn't, did you? You don't have to try to impress me. Anyway, we are almost done here. I can fix the interior stuff myself. I am going to call Cecil to tell him he can come visit as soon as he can get time off, get some sleep, and after that we can collect more materials to build your radio station."

Kevin forced a smile. "I wish we could have finished your place second, I so want Cecil to see our little radio station as soon as it is ready for him! He will be just jazzed about it!"  
Carlos watched Kevin's face and read nothing in his smile. "I guess. I'll ask Cecil again how long he thinks it will be before he gets here and we can try to have your place finished too."

Carlos wandered off to make his call. Kevin, used to listening, heard _hi babe_ and _miss you_ and _when can you be here_ and no mention of his name. He smiled, picked up a bundle of insulated copper wire and headed over to his radio station.

An hour later, when Carlos had not arrived to help him, Kevin walked over to Carlos's home. He knocked on the door and pushed it open. Carlos lay on his bed, head back, mouth open, snoring gently, his phone in his open hand. Kevin sidled over, holding his breath, and nudged the phone from Carlos's fingers. Carlos didn't move. Kevin clicked the phone on and unlocked it by holding the button against Carlos's thumb. He snuck outside again and out of range of hearing.

Kevin sat on the ground with his back to Carlos's place. It took a few minutes to copy Carlos's most interesting contacts to his own list. He used Carlos's phone to leave Cecil a friendly voicemail then sat happily scrolling through Cecil's Tumblr, cooing over the quality of Cecil's woodcarvings although Khoshekh still made him shiver. Kevin dropped the phone and hugged himself, curling into a ball in the sand. _He is holding a cat!_

 _Yes,_ he thought, _that is when I knew it was all going wrong._

Carlos found Kevin a while later, rocking back and forwards on the sand, Carlos's phone clutched in his hand, muttering quietly.  
... _from your great warmth... I take my warmth from your great warmth... I take my warmth..._  
Carlos yelled and snatched.  
"YOU TOOK MY PHONE!"  
Kevin snapped back into himself.  
"Oh! Yes, Carlos, I wanted to--"  
"DON'T EVER DO THAT! DON'T TAKE MY PHONE!"  
"But I only wanted to--"  
"NO! You don't understand. Kevin, that phone..." Carlos sat with his head in one hand, the other hand securely clamped around his phone. "This phone is the only way I have of reaching Cecil. I thought... I thought..." Carlos let a sob escape. "I thought I had lost it. Lost _him_."

Kevin frowned as he watched Carlos regain control with closed eyes and deep breaths. By the time Carlos was ready to look at Kevin, Kevin had his friendliest smile in place.  
"Oh I am so sorry, friend. I should have asked but you looked so peaceful when you were asleep. I didn't want to disturb you."  
"Don't ever do that again. Why did you need my phone?" Carlos scowled.  
"I wanted to call Cecil and tell him I had a surprise for him. I wanted to show that I am not what he thinks I am, what I was."  
Carlos sighed. “Kevin, you stole my building materials to start your radio station. You tried to make me abandon my own work to help you with yours. I’ve been patient, I’ve tried to be kind and interpret your behaviour as innocent mistakes. I have tried so hard to believe you have changed. But this? Sneaking into my bedroom? Stealing my phone while I sleep? Going through my contacts and stuff? How can I trust you?”

Kevin hung his head, drew patterns in the sand with a finger. “You would trust me if you saw me properly. If you looked right into me, my friend!” Kevin removed his sunglasses. Carlos looked into the void where eyes perhaps once looked out. “My dear sweet Carlos, can you see my light?”  
Carlos stared. "I see only emptiness. Are you even in there, Kevin?"  
Kevin nodded slowly. "Look closer, Carlos. Look deeper. Can you see me at all? I promise I am there, if you know how to look."  
Carlos could not drag his eyes away from Kevin's face. He felt himself drawn closer, closer, as if he was going to fall in. Drown.  
"How can I see _you_ if I am not here? Can you see me yet, Carlos? Keep looking until you find me. A firefly in the night. A sparkle in the darkness. Find me, Carlos, bring me out of the void."  
Carlos saw. He saw a single point of light in each patch of black velvet. It moved slowly closer, or was it expanding? The scientist could not tell. The light accelerated, inflated, created a whole universe of its own in each socket. Carlos fell back, dazzled.

Kevin knelt on the sand beside Carlos's supine form. Carlos still held Kevin's gaze. Kevin reached out both hands.  
"Overwhelming, I know, but wonderful, isn't it, friend? To share a moment such as this? Let me help you up."  
Carlos reached up and took Kevin's hands. something, a spark perhaps, flew between them before their fingertips met. Kevin grasped Carlos's hands. In that instant, Carlos saw. Carlos found Kevin.

He nodded. "I can see you now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to lovely people: bbcotaku for betaing and psychosomatic86 for suggestions about how to end this chapter.


	4. Trust me

Kevin put his sunglasses back on, helped Carlos up and held on to him. “You saw me, friend, you saw I am real? I am not what I was. The smiling god… did you see it too?” Kevin sank his head onto Carlos’s shoulder. “The smiling god is still here, weaker. It is not friendly when it whispers to me. Help me drown it out, Carlos.”

Carlos pushed Kevin back by his shoulders and held him an arm’s distance away. “Kevin, you say you have changed. You want me to trust you, but you don’t trust _me_ and I am a _scientist_.” Carlos released Kevin’s shoulders but held eye contact with his own reflection in Kevin’s glasses, and shrugged. “You could have asked me for my stock of building materials and I would have given you whatever you said you needed. You could have helped me properly to finish my place in time for Cecil’s visit and we would have moved on sooner to your radio station. You could have asked me if I would let you speak to Cecil instead of stealing my phone. Okay, I might have said no to that until I found out if Cecil wanted to hear from you first, but I would have considered it.”

Kevin mumbled something. “What did you say? I didn’t hear you.” Carlos moved closer to Kevin.  
“Will you still help me?” Kevin sounded unsure for the first time since he met Carlos. “Friend?”  
Carlos smiled and held out his hand. “Yes of course. I want this radio station too, neighbour.”  
Kevin smiled and accepted Carlos’s handshake. “Well then, friend, we should get busy! I like to be productive. I must earn my rewards.”  
Carlos frowned. “Says who? What rewards?”  
“Oh, you don’t know the _StrexCode of Conduct?_ My old employers had so _many_ rules about how we humble worker bees could be rewarded depending on the level of our productivity. These stains on my shirt happened because… someone was not productive enough. I don’t remember the exact details. A name, perhaps, Shaun? Or was it Sean or Shawn? One of those. Lauren sent him to me one day and… Oh smiling god no, _nononono… I take my warmth from…_ ” Carlos stepped back and watched as Kevin curled up on the sand, arms around his head, chanting quietly.

Eventually Kevin uncoiled and sat upright, face streaked and filthy. Carlos sat beside him and put an arm around his shoulder. Kevin flinched but did not shuffle away. Carlos started to talk, distracting Kevin with stories about science and about Cecil. Stories about Cecil doing science. Carlos felt Kevin’s shoulders shake as he described Cecil’s reaction to Strex-bugs escaping from their tank in the lab. Carlos stole a glance at Kevin’s profile. He was smiling. Carlos patted Kevin’s shoulder a couple of times. “Come on, let’s get to work on your radio station now. We need more stuff. I’ll fetch the sled, you make a list of what we need.

Later, stopping for a break on the way home, Kevin asked Carlos if he was looking forward to Cecil’s visit. Carlos frowned. "Of course! Why wouldn’t I? I want him to visit and to stay. I think I want that anyway. It's hard to tell, you know?" He dropped his rope and sat on the loaded sled. Kevin scratched his head and dropped his rope too.  
"Hey Carlos, do you want to talk, friend? I can listen. I am used to being rewarded for talking, provided I said all the right things, but I can listen too. I want Cecil to come here. I want to make it all up to him. I want to make it all up."

Carlos sighed again and rested his chin on his hand, elbow on his knee, foot on the edge of the sled runner. "I love him and he loves me. I am sure of that. But it has been so long, so long since we actually saw each other. It's like that was a different me, a different life. What if... No, I should not trouble you with my personal stuff. We should move on and get building."  
Kevin walked round to face Carlos. He shook his head. "I will not go another step until you get this off your chest. You know the old saying, a problem shared is a problem someone else knows about and can use against you." Kevin paused waiting for any movement from Carlos. Carlos sighed again and changed hand and elbow and knee and foot to rest his head on the other side. Kevin sat beside his neighbour on a slightly scorched microwave oven on the sled. He raised a hand as if to pat the scientist's leg, but withdrew it before making contact. Carlos shifted again, both feet up, both elbows on knees, hands clasped, head down.

"It's just... just... what if we have both changed? It has been a year for him, feels like so much longer for me. I know we've been emailing and texting and talking on the phone regularly, and I check his Tumblr when I remember and reblog his stuff but... What if that's it? Maybe we got used to being on our own again. What if we can't stand each other's company?"  
Kevin frowned. "Don't you want him here, in person?"  
Carlos jerked upright and turned. "Yes, I miss him so much! I miss the things we did together. I want my Cecil here with me, but what if he is not my Cecil anymore? What if I'm not his Carlos? We have both been through so much! It has changed us. I hear how Cecil has changed in the things he says and in the silences that tell me the things he does not want to say. I have changed. I have always been self-reliant, that is the first thing a scientist is! He taught me that I didn’t need to be self-reliant all the time. But now? Ah." Carlos hid his face and breathed deeply. "Sorry. I'm fine. I am fine."

Kevin sat with Carlos for a minute. This would not do at all! Cecil had to come here. Cecil had to come to Carlos. And to Kevin. He raised a hand and lightly patted Carlos's shoulder. Carlos stood abruptly. "Kevin, I said I'm fine. Let's move."

Kevin walked back to his discarded rope. "Cecil is a hard working radio host. If he is to want to stay for longer or to visit often, we should have a radio station to show off to him. Think how impressed he will be by that! How could he fail to love you if you can give him everything he wants?"  
Carlos picked up his rope too and they hauled their haul. "If I know Cecil he is not going to think about a job. He has a job he loves. He's not going to want to leave Night Vale like I did, or Earl, the scoutmaster-turned-chef he tells me about so often. He loves Night Vale, for all its faults."  
Kevin grinned. “Oh Carlos, are you telling me you have a rival for Cecil’s affection?”

Carlos ignored Kevin’s question, unsure whether Kevin was referring to Night Vale or the chef. They completed their salvage-run in silence. Carlos continued building walls while Kevin dismantled a karaoke machine for the microphone and cassette deck.

  
After several more trips for materials, and conversations limited to walls, roofs and electronics, the radio station was finished. Kevin stood back, linked arms with Carlos and grinned. “Oh this is just _perfect_! Don’t you think so too, neighbour? Any more news on when Cecil will be here? Will he be here soon? I hope so. I do hope he likes it. Will you tell him? Will you tell him we worked together and I am not a threat?”  
Carlos surveyed the low, rectangular building with the tall antenna on top. “We have made something remarkable, Kevin. Are you going to try it out? Broadcast a show?”  
Kevin frowned and shook his head. “Oh no, no no. I wanted to make it for Cecil. He should have that honour first, my friend. I know it will work perfectly the way I designed it.”  
Carlos smiled. “It’s a gift for Cecil? Don’t you want to use it too?”  
“Yes of course! But it wants… Cecil can let me take my turn after.” Kevin’s smile lit his face. “Oh! You know what would be just so much _fun_? If we wrap it for him and let him guess, before he finds out what it is for!”  
Carlos nodded and laughed. “I think he will see right away that it is for broadcasting his show, It is difficult to disguise its function.”  
Kevin laughed too. “I can certainly do that, Carlos. I think we have earned a _celebration_.”


	5. Pass.

Carlos yelped into the phone, making Kevin jump.  
“They said yes? That’s so… NEAT!”  
Carlos laughed and wandered away from Kevin.  
“No, I’m doing science on my own as usual. I hope you can meet Doug and Alicia, I’ve told them so much about you!”  
“The good stuff, honey, it’s all good stuff.”  
“No I did not tell them that! But I will want to find out for myself all over again.”  
Carlos sniggered.  
“I cannot wait to see you again. It’s going to be so _good!”_  
“Mmm yes. Can you pack a few things for me? Have you space in your bag? Should I email you a list?”  
“Well, yes I hope we need those. Uh-huh…. Mmhmm… yeah that too…. And a coffee hammer? I know how much you like your coffee and I never quite get the angry chanting right.”  
“Miss you too, babe. I love you.”  
“Okay see you soon. I can’t wait! Oh I said it already I know but a good scientist always repeats—“  
“Haha we can do plenty repeats of that too just to make sure our results are reliable.”  
“No _you_ hang up!”

Carlos returned to walk with Kevin along the desiccated boardwalk. Kevin linked his arm with Carlos’s.  
“You didn’t mention _me,_ friend?”  
“No.” Carlos sighed. “I don’t know how he will react. I don’t want to put him off visiting.”  
“Oh! No, no you should not put him off.” Kevin stopped and turned to look at Carlos. “Cecil must visit. I am so looking forward to _having_ him here. Do you think he might be afraid of me?”  
Carlos shrugged. “I don’t know.”  
“Maybe he will hate me.” Kevin faced front again, frowning, and they walked slowly across the wooden planks. “I would not blame him for that. Have you told him anything about me at all?”  
“No, nothing.” Carlos let Kevin’s arm slip from his. “I have not mentioned you.”  
“You lied to _Cecil.”_ Kevin stopped again, leaning against the railing as if he was looking out to sea.  
Carlos leaned beside Kevin, facing inland. “No, not exactly. It never came up. I did not say I have not met you. Cecil has not asked. I am not _lying_ to him.”  
Kevin persisted. “You _lied_ to Cecil just a moment ago. You told him you were doing science on your own, but you are here with me. Is this science? Are you ashamed to admit you spend time in my company? Does he not like you to have friends?”  
“No!” Carlos turned his head to meet his reflected gaze in Kevin’s sunglasses. “That’s not it at all! I just don’t think Cecil needs to know you are here yet. He knows about my friends in the masked army.”  
Kevin returned his attention to the flat rocky sand ahead of him. “You just have not told him about me. Is it so difficult to say, _hey honey guess who else is here, wants to see you too and is not evil? Kevin!”_

Kevin walked away. Carlos followed.  
“Kevin, wait. Kevin!”  
Kevin slowed down and allowed Carlos to catch up and rest a hand on his shoulder.  
“Kevin, I’m sorry, I have offended you. I am happy that we met, I’m glad we could help each other. I know you struggle sometimes with your _smiling god_ thing but—”  
Kevin stopped so abruptly that Carlos almost collided with him.  
“Smiling god?”  
“Yes! You know, when you stop and get all distant and your eyes... whatever... go all weird, more weird, and rock back and forwards chanting. Sometimes you curl up real small and I have to wait for you to recover.”  
Kevin faced Carlos. “I don’t really do that, do I? You’re fooling with me. Right?”  
Carlos frowned. “You don’t remember? When you start saying _nonononono_ and _I take my warmth from—“_  
Kevin gripped tightly to Carlos’s forearm, making the scientist twist away and rub his arm. “No! Carlos, friend, tell me you are lying to me now too.” Carlos shook his head. Kevin rubbed his hair and his face, looked at his hands and wiped them on his stained shirt as he hugged himself tightly. He spoke, voice only just audible, “I thought I was me.”

Carlos put an arm around Kevin’s shoulders and encouraged him to walk back to the lab Carlos had built as his first project. Kevin stopped at the threshold.  
“May I enter your lab, neighbour? Really? Oh, I am _honoured!”_  
Carlos nodded.  
“Make yourself at home. I want to know if I can work out what’s happening to you. With _science._ ” Kevin looked doubtful and did not step inside. “With your permission? I want to help you, Kevin.”  
Kevin shuddered. “ _They_ helped me to become _productive._ They… Oh no, oh no…”

Carlos yanked Kevin into the lab and pulled his dark glasses from his face. Kevin immediately covered up with his hands and stood, breathing fast and shallow. He shook his head slowly.  
“No, not this time. No. No. Stop telling me… No! Carlos, drown it out!”  
Carlos guided Kevin over to the mattress in the corner of the lab that had been his first home and told him to lie down. He lay with Kevin’s head on his shoulder, held him and babbled about science while Kevin twitched and fought the lights in his head.

Kevin woke in Carlos’s arms. The scientist slept quietly. Kevin listened to his breathing for a while then moved slowly, carefully, to retrieve his sunglasses. Carlos did not wake when Kevin sat beside him again, lifted Carlos’s hand, stroked it and touched his lips to the wrist, murmuring _thank you, friend._ Kevin waited for a reaction. When it did not come, he leaned down and gently brushed Carlos’s temple. Carlos shifted and smiled in his sleep. Kevin kissed Carlos one more time, pressed closed lips lightly against Carlos’s mouth. Carlos _hmm_ -ed and turned. Kevin leapt back a discreet distance and sat on the floor. Carlos said one word in confusion as he woke.  
_"Cecil?"_

Kevin smiled. "Hey, neighbour, just little old me! You think Cecil will be here soon?"  
Carlos sat up and rubbed his head and his face. He yawned.  
"I hope so. He makes the best coffee. I miss him. I dreamed he was here, I felt as if... it felt real, but he is not here therefore I conclude I had a dream about him."  
Kevin grinned. "A dream you want to share, friend?"  
Carlos laughed. "No, I think I will keep this one private." Carlos's smile dropped. "I got a message from Cecil yesterday after I called him. He is allowed time off work but he doesn't know how to get here. I don't know how to get out. So maybe he won't be able to come. Kevin..."  
Kevin, lightning fast, was by Carlos's side with arms wrapped around him.  
"Oh, dear friend! He has to come. There will be a way. There is _always_ a way for... It will find a way." Kevin felt Carlos's head drop onto his shoulder. "You comforted me when I needed you, you drove out my demon again with science. How can I be permitted to comfort you?"  
Carlos did not respond. He sighed and raised a hand to his eyes. Kevin kissed the top of Carlos's head. "You must miss him terribly. I miss my Vanessa. We are both missing something precious. So precious. Perhaps we might..." Carlos raised his head to look at Kevin. Kevin looked away. "Perhaps we might be of some comfort to one another. You know, _physically."_  
Carlos frowned. Kevin held his breath.

A few seconds later, Kevin was startled by an abrupt laugh from Carlos and a hug. He waited, still refusing to look at Carlos's face.  
"Aww, Kevin! You made a joke!" Carlos laughed again. "That's real progress, you know. For a few seconds you almost had me! Ha! This is great news!"  
Kevin met Carlos's mirth with confusion.  
"Carlos, friend, I meant—"  
"You meant to make me laugh. _Didn't you_ , you big joker?"  
"Uh, I—"  
"Well I appreciate your sense of humour, Kevin. The thought that we could... I mean I _like_ you in a weird kind of way but you still miss Vanessa and I have Cecil, although at a distance that seems to vary between _just around the corner_ and _on another plane of reality,_ and—"  
"Okay friend, I am glad we understand each other. I'm, uh, I am going to go to my radio station and make sure everything is just _so_ for Cecil's visit. Will I see you later?"  
Carlos shrugged and nodded.

Later, after science and text messages and a phone call, Carlos called in at Kevin's radio station. Kevin sat on the floor, smiling and tinkering with his microphone.  
"Hey Kevin! Aren't you tempted to broadcast a show? You could tell everyone about the Masked Army's latest campaign and how the town is developing."  
Kevin beamed at Carlos. "Hey neighbour!" He picked up his sunglasses and put them on, hiding deep sockets that sparkled. "No, I need to make sure everyone can receive its broadcast first. It would not be very productive to have a show with no listeners!"  
Carlos smiled. "I guess not. We can go on a salvage trip for old radios to fix up. You could open up a radio shop, maybe take over part of the ice cream parlour since there isn't actually any ice cream?"  
Kevin nodded and giggled. "Oh what a _wonderful_ idea! Carlos, you are so _clever!_ I am not at all surprised that my former employer had such _trouble_ finding you. But this... um... Carlos? Neighbour? Uh..."  
Kevin removed his sunglasses. Carlos stared at the bright yellow suns where should be velvety void.

Carlos took Kevin's wrist and pulled him out of the radio station. Kevin fell and chanted in the sand. Carlos lifted him up and carried him into his home, laid him on his bed and held him tight, stroking his head, talking loudly about materials and building methods and anything he could think of that Kevin could focus on. He watched as the light dimmed and receded to nothing.

Kevin sat up, gripped both hands into his hair, grimaced and groaned.  
"I'm sorry, so sorry. I couldn't stop it on my own. Carlos, friend..." Kevin scratched at his empty sockets. Carlos held Kevin's wrists, pulled his hands away from his face until Kevin gave in and went limp.  
"Okay, Kevin? _One,_ you are going to stay with me until you beat this thing, whatever it is. _Two_ , I am going to use science to help you. _Three_ , if you are still being weird when Cecil is here you will have to stay out of sight. If you go all _turn around bright eyes_ on him he will freak out. And _four_..."  
Kevin nodded. "Anything. Anything to be free of this... this... _four?"_  
" _Four,_ um, you are not Cecil and I am not Vanessa."

 

(NOTE: Carlos is referring to this video [here](http://youtu.be/lcOxhH8N3Bo))


	6. The Visit (part 1)

Carlos watched over Kevin carefully for a few days. Kevin acted as Carlos's lab assistant when he worked, walked and talked with him when Carlos wanted to relax and slept curled up nearby. Doug frowned at Carlos when he returned from the latest scuffle with Alicia and a few other masked warriors, but Alicia said they understood and, with a knowing look at their partner, that Doug could be less preachy. 

Carlos had a favour to ask.  
"Alicia? Doug? When Cecil arrives, could you..." He looked over at Kevin. "Could you, uh, supervise Kevin?"  
Alicia nodded. Doug frowned. "You want us to hide the empty man from your other boyfriend?"  
"No! Kevin is not my boyfriend." Carlos shook his head and Alicia rolled their eyes. "He is a friend, but not a boyfriend. He should not be left on his own. Sometimes he needs to be distracted from his own thoughts. Please, Doug, Alicia, he needs help."  
Alicia reached down and prodded Kevin's sleeping form.  
"He looks funny. I will show him how to make a mask. Make him look better, a mask."  
Doug was unimpressed. "Masks are for warriors. He is not a warrior."  
Alicia rolled their eyes again and called for their dog. Doug sighed and shrugged. "We will hide the strange man from your boyfriend because Alicia wants us to."  
Carlos offered the huge man a handshake. "Thank you, Doug. He might put Cecil off, that's all, and they know each other from bad times before. I want to tell Cecil first, my own way, that Kevin is here and not dangerous."

A few days later Carlos whooped and punched the air on a salvage trip for interior decorating materials with Kevin, Doug, Alicia and their dog. Kevin jumped.  
"Hey friend! You startled me! Good news?"  
"Yes, the best! Cecil knows how to get into the dog park! He is on his way! Oh, this is so great... I want to go home and paint my place so it is nicer for Cecil, but I want to start walking to meet him!"  
"That is wonderful news, neighbour! You can paint and I will walk out to lead him home, or if you prefer I could stay and decorate. I like decorating!"  
Carlos smiled. "That is such a kind offer, Kevin, but I think I will leave the painting for now. If Cecil wants to stay he will want a say in the colour scheme anyway. I doubt he will like the _surprised sunrise_ kitchen and bathroom formula emulsion we found anyway."  
Doug started to speak but Alicia poked him in the ribs before he made any proper words. Alicia grinned at Carlos. "Don't worry, tiny science man, we will make sure you have time to get to know your radio man again. Doug, remember one time I went to battle and you stayed behind?" Doug nodded. "When I came home?" Alicia sniggered. Doug walked away.

As soon as they got back into town, Alicia asked Kevin to go with them out to the Masked Army camp to help with their new sand-based currency, still under development. Kevin looked at Carlos who smiled and nodded, before agreeing. He hugged Carlos goodbye.  
"Oh I am _so_ sorry I will not be here to greet Cecil when he arrives! But I am needed elsewhere. Carlos, you will tell him, won't you? About us?"  
Carlos frowned. "I will tell him about you. I promise." Carlos cleared the frown from his eyes. "Nice things. I will tell Cecil that you are not evil."  
Kevin kissed Carlos on the cheek and jumped back, wagging a forefinger and grinning. "Don't mention the radio station. I want to surprise him myself."  
Carlos laughed and promised again.

By Carlos's timing, Cecil arrived the next day in the morning. Carlos checked his phone every time it beeped with an update on his progress, excitement and nerves causing his stomach to churn and his head to buzz a little. Each time, Carlos sat with his eyes closed, breathing, counting his pulse until it slowed. Eventually, Carlos got the text that made him head for home.  
_I can see a town!_

Carlos waited by his lab entrance on the main road in and out of town. Road was an exaggeration, it didn’t lead anywhere yet and it was only a wide strip of flattened, compacted sand with the biggest rocks removed. There were boardwalks on both sides before low wooden buildings rose from the dust. Carlos smiled, it looked like the set of a Wild West movie, slightly spoiled by the lack of horses and the townsfolk’s preference for nineteen-eighties fashions. 

Carlos saw Cecil before Cecil saw Carlos. The scientist stood, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, grinning and tongue tied. Cecil walked up, dropped his bag and smiled. He stood a couple of feet away.  
“So, I got here.”  
Carlos raised an eyebrow. “That is evident by the observation that you are standing right there in front of me. That’s science.”  
“Umm, yeah. Is this your lab?” Cecil pointed.  
Carlos looked round. “Yes, that is what it is. Would you like to come in? It’s not as fancy as the one I had in Night Vale but it is sufficient for my scientific studies here.”  
“Yes, show me your lab. You chose a good location, right next to a pizza place!”  
Carlos nodded. “Mmhmm, shame they don’t often make pizza. I think they have a supply problem. Come in!”

Carlos picked up Cecil’s bag at the same time Cecil leaned to reach the strap. They collided with awkward apologies and steps back. Carlos lifted the bag and held the lab door open for Cecil. Cecil went inside.  
“Well this is very… scientific.” Cecil smiled at Carlos. Carlos put Cecil’s bag down.  
“Cecil, how long has it been, for you?” Carlos held out a hand and stepped forward.  
Cecil sighed. “A whole year, almost. I’ve missed you so much!”  
Carlos pulled Cecil into a hug. “I missed you too. Time is different here, you know that when Rochelle went into the house that did not exist she said she was there for hours but in Night Vale maybe only forty five minutes had passed?”  
Cecil wove his fingers into Carlos’s unruly hair. “I really missed this! How long has it been for you?”  
Carlos rested his forehead on Cecil’s shoulder while Cecil stroked and finger-combed Carlos’s mane. “As far as I can tell, I went into the house that does not exist five or six years ago. Cecil, I have not seen you for more than five… and I… I…”

Carlos broke down and clung to Cecil, sobbing quietly. Cecil held him tightly, stroking his back and murmuring reassurance. Carlos calmed after a few minutes. He took a couple of deep breaths and released his grip on Cecil.  
“Sorry, I just…”  
“Carlos, I had no idea. Why didn’t you tell me, sweetie?”  
Carlos shrugged. “I did not want you to worry about me. I did not want you to think I wouldn’t or couldn’t be as patient with you as you have been with me.” Cecil smiled and let a giggle escape. Carlos smiled back. “What’s funny, honey?”  
“I have two weeks off in Night Vale time. Does this mean I can stay here for longer? You know we have five years of catching up to do.”  
Carlos laughed. “We can think about that later. Let me show you my home."

Carlos and Cecil walked to Carlos's home, trying out how it felt to hold hands again. Cecil admired how neat it was and unpacked. When he finished, he joined Carlos in the living room, sitting beside him on the sofa.  
"So, what time of day is it now?"  
Carlos shrugged. "Time does not seem to mean as much here as it does in Night Vale. It is almost always light. I got blackout blinds so we can sleep better. I feel like it is late afternoon."  
Cecil smiled and took Carlos's hand. "Neat! We can plan our first evening together!" Carlos squeezed Cecil's hand. Cecil's smile dropped a little. "Carlos, are you happy that I am here?"  
Carlos flustered. "Of course! I have been thinking about you and about how much I miss you and how much I want to be with you... I mean your actual physical, tangible presence, for so long!"  
Cecil shuffled closer to Carlos. "Um, I know it has been a while. What did you imagine our meeting would be like?"  
Carlos closed his eyes and sank his head back against the sofa. "Oh. Are you disappointed with me? Cecil I'm sorry, I imagined things would not be like this. I love you, I really do, and I know you love me too but I feel... Now you're here, suddenly I don't know what I want to do. I have been on my own for so long."  
Cecil frowned. "I imagined seeing you again would be different from this too."  
Carlos pulled Cecil's hand into his lap and clasped it with both of his. "Tell me what you imagined our reunion would be like."  
Cecil smiled. "Well, I imagined you would see me from a distance, come out to meet me, pull me into your arms and kiss me. We would laugh and joke and you would say cute sciencey things and we would try real hard to keep our hands off each other until we got to your place, then... Oh Carlos, I want to have done all those things but I can wait until you are ready." Cecil stroked Carlos's face with his free hand. Carlos returned Cecil's gaze for a few seconds. Cecil sighed. "What did you imagine?"  
Carlos closed his eyes and sank his head back again. "I thought that I would be doing science and I'd feel your hand on my shoulder and I would turn around and we would hug and kiss and laugh and... well there's a bed in my lab of course. And I want to do all of that but I felt all of those years pulling at me, I have changed."  
Cecil studied Carlos for a few minutes. "You have a little more grey hair, I like it. And you have lost some weight, I bet you don't eat properly."  
"Cecil I went for weeks at a time without speaking except on the phone, or to myself. You remember how long it took me to learn to talk to you, properly? I feel like that again. Like I will mess up by saying something wrong."

Cecil rested his head on Carlos's shoulder. "Maybe we should go back a few paces. Carlos, I love you, I want to be with you, you know, _be_ with you. But for tonight we could just go out on a date. Dinner, watch the lights in the sky, scream into the unknown, come back here for coffee or a drink, I can sleep on the sofa or something. I want you back in my life and I'll take things as slowly as you need."  
Carlos angled his head to rest his cheek against Cecil's hair. "Thank you for being so patient with me. Again."


	7. Visit part 2

Carlos took Cecil on a walk through town and showed off the technical projects he had helped with, such as the solar power plant that made use of the almost perpetual light and the water treatment facility. They strolled along the beachfront, arm in arm, admiring the carnival atmosphere and listening to the screams from the perpetual-motion rollercoaster. Carlos ended their tour at the restaurant beside his lab where they ate something that was almost completely unlike pizza before returning to walk along the boardwalk. 

They sat on the edge, legs dangling over the side, feet just above the sand, looking out over the desert plains. Cecil rested his head on Carlos's shoulder, Carlos giggled and put one hand on Cecil's knee. They looked up at the lights in the sky. Cecil slipped an arm around Carlos. Carlos smiled at the tingling he felt where Cecil's hand stroked his back.  
"It is reassuring to know that, sometimes at least, we are looking at the same lights in the same sky, although from a different perspective when we are apart." Carlos squeezed Cecil's knee gently. "Let's go home."

Back in Carlos's compact home, Cecil produced a bottle of wine from his bag. Carlos grinned and fetched two clean beakers. Cecil laughed and rolled his eyes.   
"Remember the first time you invited me back to your lab? When you still lived there? You drank out of beakers and ate off plastic microwave trays."  
"Oh honey, I was so nervous! I couldn't believe you were real, that someone actually wanted to be with me. I was embarrassed that I had invited you back and I didn't even have wine glasses." Carlos poured two carefully measured beakers of wine and passed one to Cecil. They sat on Carlos's sofa, watching each other from opposite ends. Cecil smiled.  
"Are you nervous now?"  
Carlos grinned. "A little, but it is a different kind of nervous. Back then I was afraid that you would not want to be with me. Now.."  
"Now? Are you afraid because I do want to be with you?"  
"I am afraid of disappointing you."

Cecil shook his head. "Speaking as a scientist's boyfriend, and that makes me a scientist too, Uh-uh! shush," Cecil held up a hand, palm facing Carlos, "don't interrupt sweetie! I can quantify the way I feel about being here with you. After careful analysis I can report with confidence that I am precisely zero percent disappointed to be here and o-o-oh, one hundred and fifteen percent _at least_ excited to be able to see you and touch you again."  
Carlos exploded. "That makes no sense! You can't be more than one hundred percent anything! Cecil..." Carlos grinned as he realised Cecil was laughing at him. "Oh, I see. You were having a joke and I fell for it."   
Cecil smiled and touched Carlos's arm. "Can we just chat for a while? Like normal?"

"Sure," Carlos began. "I have shown you most of what I have been doing here. Tell me about what's happening in Night Vale, what have you been doing?" He sipped his wine and swirled it, watching the way it clung to the sides of the beaker.   
Cecil smiled. "We-e-ell, we speak almost every day from my point of view so you know most of it already, and you can still hear my show although not always the current one. There is not much else to tell. Getting to know Earl again has been weird. Nice, but weird. He remembers things, you know, things I do not remember and that is unsettling. But I am learning to cook at last."  
Carlos laughed. "I kept telling myself that you lived for decades without me so a few months of my absence would not cause you malnutrition. I have learned to cook with whatever supplies we have. I have a nice recipe for breakfast..."  
Carlos watched Cecil's throat move as he swallowed some wine. Cecil continued. "I drank too much for a while because I missed you so much. But it did not help me to forget because I did not want to forget. I got over it. I mean, I still missed you, but I could cope. It started to hurt less, like I would see something or Maureen would say something and I'd think _oh I must tell Carlos!_ but then I'd remember you were not with me and I would shrug it off instead of getting upset about it."  
Carlos nodded. "I missed you too. When I first realised I could not step back into your world after Erika I got real down. Alicia told me I could adapt and cope, or not. I explored and investigated and built my lab and... Cecil I missed you all the time. I would climb up to the lighthouse and look for you in the picture frames, watch you, until Doug told me to stop because it was creepy."   
Cecil laughed. "I promise you would not have seen anything interesting."

Carlos moved closer. He opened his mouth to say _Cecil, I met someone here who knows you_ but changed his mind. Cecil moved closer too. They sat together, side by side, drinking wine and not chatting. Carlos put his beaker down, took Cecil's from him and set it down too. Carlos half turned in his seat to face Cecil, feeling his heart race and trying to control his breathing. He was sure Cecil could see how much he trembled as he raised a hand to trace Cecil's face with one finger. Cecil closed his eyes and remained still, allowing Carlos to run a finger gently over his eyebrow, his cheekbone, his jaw from ear to chin. Cecil lifted his hand to hold Carlos's and kissed his palm, letting go again and opening his eyes. Carlos stroked his hand across Cecil's hair, fingers causing a tingle down the radio man's back and making him grin.

Carlos leaned forward and kissed Cecil carefully, light pressure on his cheek then his lips, Cecil's head held still by the hand in his hair. In response, Cecil cupped Carlos's face with both hands and kissed him more firmly, his lips pulling at Carlos's, teasing with his tongue until Carlos gripped him around the waist and back with both arms and pulled Cecil over on top of him. They lay on the sofa, lost in the moment, feeling the distance and time that separated them recede into insignificance. Carlos didn't realise he was crying until Cecil wiped his face and kissed his eyes.

Cecil broke off first.   
"Carlos? I have had a long day. I need a shower and bed."  
Carlos nodded. "There should be hot water. We have to be careful not to use too much. It all gets cleaned and recycled but there are two of us here now and--"  
Cecil giggled. "Are you saying we need to shower together to conserve water?"  
Carlos nodded, serious, "If that's okay with you, for scientific reasons, we should shower together."  
Cecil rolled off Carlos, off the sofa, and landed on the floor, grinning. "I'm totally fine with that. Help me up?"

Carlos sat, stood and offered both hands to Cecil to pull him upright. He led Cecil into the bedroom but Cecil hung back when Carlos pulled him towards the little bathroom.   
"I brought you some things," he explained. "I didn't know if you would be able to get these here."   
Cecil rummaged in the bottom of his bag and produced bottles of Carlos's favourite shower gel and conditioner. Carlos grinned in delight and kissed Cecil's face. Cecil asked, "can I wash your hair like I used to?"  
Carlos nodded, "I would like that very much. Did you bring anything else you thought we might want?"  
Cecil smiled. "Of course. I brought a coffee hammer and some fresh beans."  
"That's great, honey! I meant--"  
"And your journals, the past year's subscription copies just kept coming. I didn't know if I could throw your mail into the dog park."  
"Thanks! Probably safest not to. Some people put a premium on nice thin paper."  
"This..." Cecil produced Carlos's laptop, "in case you could use it. Is the wifi good enough to watch Netflix on it?" Carlos nodded.  
"I built a computer out of spare parts but it stays in the lab. Did you bring any... Oh never mind. We can watch a movie later and finish the wine if you're not too tired."  
Cecil smirked. "Who said I was tired?" He took a packet of condoms and a bottle of lube from his bag and put them in Carlos's bedside drawer. "Just in case. No pressure."  
Carlos smiled. 

Carlos and Cecil helped each other out of their clothes, taking turns, undressing each other slowly. They stood naked at last in the little bedroom, watching each other for a moment before Carlos held out his hand and led Cecil into the bathroom. The tiled area sloped to a drain in the centre of the floor and the shower head was positioned to allow room for two. Cecil was impressed.  
"Wow, you made this?"  
"Yes, I did," Carlos grinned. "Do you like it? I know you always wanted a proper wet room but converting our place was too difficult. I could build whatever I wanted here."  
Cecil laughed. "This is perfect!"  
Carlos shook his head. "teething troubles, though, I designed and built a solar water heater which is great but limited water. We can have the water on only for short bursts when we need it. I set it up for that so it goes off automatically. I know you like nice, long showers so you might find this a little annoying, but it is very environmentally friendly and--"  
Cecil stood under the shower head and pulled Carlos towards him. "Honey, the best thing about this shower is that I am sharing it with you. Come here and show me how to turn it on."

Carlos reached behind Cecil and pushed a button set into the tiles. Water cascaded cold then warm over Cecil, making him shriek and giggle. The water cut off and Carlos hit the button again, soaking his hair and Cecil's in the next brief downpour. Cecil reached for the shampoo and lathered Carlos's hair, working his fingertips over Carlos's scalp and making the scientist _hmm_ in appreciation. Carlos returned the favour, working rose scented bubbles into Cecil's hair then spreading the slippery foam over his shoulders and back. Carlos slithered soapy hands down Cecil's back to his buttocks, massaging gentle circular movements into his muscles. Cecil sniggered, pulled Carlos closer and pushed their hips together.

"Are you teasing me, mister scientist?"  
Carlos grinned and hit the water button again. "Might be." He rinsed his hair then Cecil's. Cecil worked conditioner into Carlos's hair.   
"The instructions say to leave that on for five minutes before rinsing, for extra soft hair. What can we do for five minutes, hmm?"  
Carlos smiled. "We could count three hundred elephants? One elephant, two elephants, three... Aah... Ah! We could do that. We could definitely do that instead."  
Cecil smiled and kissed Carlos's hip, looking up at him from where he knelt on the tiles.   
"You want to keep counting? You know, scientifically assess how well I can make you last for five minutes?"  
Carlos sniggered. "We only have four minutes left now, honey."  
Cecil mouthed at Carlos's balls again, licked up his shaft, took the head of Carlos's cock into his mouth and hummed around it, flicking his tongue around to rediscover the area that made Carlos gasp and moan. Carlos leaned his shoulders against the cool of the tiled wall and closed his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The real smut is in the next chapter.


	8. Visit (part 3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's just porn. Skip it if you want, it adds nothing to the plot.

After their shower, Carlos took Cecil's hand and led him to bed.   
"I don't know why I thought this would be difficult for me. Five years is a long time but I feel like I stepped through that oak door just days ago." He kissed Cecil with more affection than heat, stroking Cecil's face and hair. "When we were apart, what did you miss most?"  
Cecil pressed himself full-length against Carlos, rolling Carlos over onto his back and landing half on top of him.  
"This, maybe? Being able to see you and touch you. Or perhaps simpler things, you know, the little signs that we lived in the same space at the same time." Carlos _hmm_ -ed and nodded. Cecil explained, "I missed coming home late and finding your towel and shorts on the bathroom floor, even though I used to scold you for it. I missed waking up early and listening to you trying to be quiet in the kitchen. I really missed the part in between. Waking up in the night and listening to your breathing. The apartment is real quiet without you."  
Carlos pulled Cecil on top of him. "I missed... It's difficult to say. I missed you so much, but I was thrown into a completely new situation. There was nothing familiar, nowhere that reminded me of you, nothing that made me think of home, it was hard, real hard, to hang on to you sometimes and I felt guilty, like I was letting you slip away from me. Sometimes I would fall asleep and I'd wake up and wonder if I dreamed all of it. Night Vale, you, everything that existed was this desert, or in this desert and... well. I am glad I am a scientist because I knew to trust the evidence in my phone memory and not my own imperfect memory. I missed seeing you, watching your face change to show your feelings so clearly, like now... oh please don't cry, honey! You're here and I'm here and love you and you're real as far as I can tell and..."

Carlos wiped Cecil's face. Cecil kissed him. "Sorry. I don't know where that came from."  
Carlos smiled. "It's okay babe, Being together again is a lot to get used to. Let me look after you?"  
Cecil smiled. "Thought you'd never ask!"  
Carlos sniggered. "It has been five years but I'm pretty sure I can remember how to make you relax." He rolled Cecil over onto his back and straddled him. "You like me to touch you."

It was a statement, not a question. Carlos started at Cecil's head, stroked his hair and his face, kissed his eyebrows and jaw, making Cecil smile and giggle. He kissed Cecil gently, pulling away when Cecil tried to turn up the heat, murmuring _what's the hurry, sweetie?_ and trailing fingers down Cecil's neck to his shoulders. Carlos touched first with fingers than followed with light kisses, tracing Cecil's collarbones and sternum, sliding his hands down Cecil's arms before kissing from the inside of Cecil's elbows to his palms and sucking once on each fingertip. Cecil giggled and flinched at the sensation. Carlos returned his attention to Cecil's chest and stomach, kissing and sucking at his nipples, blowing air over them until Cecil wriggled at the cold then warming them with his tongue and rubbing circles around them with his fingers. Carlos trailed kisses down Cecil's stomach, pausing with his mouth level with the head of Cecil's erection.

"What do you want me to do?"   
Cecil sat up and wove a hand into Carlos's damp hair to guide his head up for a hot, sloppy kiss. Cecil stared deep into Carlos's eyes and said, "Everything. I want you to do everything you have not been able to do for the past five years."  
Carlos giggled. "That could take some time! Are you sure you are not too tired from your journey."  
Cecil laughed. "You're going to keep me awake, right?"  
Carlos smiled. "For as long as I can."

Carlos shuffled down the bed and massaged the sole of Cecil's left foot. Cecil started a complaint. "Carlos! Honey, if you... aaah!" Carlos released Cecil's foot and nuzzled up from the inside of Cecil's knee to his groin, taking Cecil's balls into his mouth and dragging his teeth gently over the sensitive skin and making Cecil's cock twitch. He repeated from the other side, stopping for longer, sucking carefully on each testicle, listening to Cecil moan quietly. Carlos licked with a soft tongue from the base of Cecil's erection to the tip and pulled it into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the head. After a minute, he pulled off to incoherent sounds of frustrated complaint. Carlos sniggered. "It'll be worth it, babe. Switch places."

Cecil shifted over, Carlos found the lube and lay down, Cecil straddled him.  
"No, right up here, honey, I want you in my mouth. Mmm, yeah like that."  
Cecil straddled Carlos's shoulders, knees wide, sitting back on his chest.  
"Kneel up a bit, help me fix the pillows just right." Carlos guided Cecil's hips with both hands. Cecil gripped the bedstead for balance and put an extra pillow under Carlos's head with the other. Carlos looked up at Cecil and smiled. Cecil smiled back.

Carlos lubed his fingers. Cecil helped guide his cock into Carlos's mouth then returned both hands to the bedstead. Carlos spread lube around Cecil's entrance with the fingers of both hands, teasing him, circling and probing without pushing in further than the first ring of muscle. Cecil groaned and tried to push down onto Carlos's hand. Carlos hummed disapproval, lips and tongue spreading the vibration to the head of Cecil's cock, making Cecil thrust forward again into Carlos's mouth. Cecil giggled. "You are such a fucking tease, Carlos, I swear I will... oh fuck me!"  
Carlos thrust a finger deep into Cecil, still teasing with his other hand. Cecil pushed down again. Carlos added a second finger, curling and twisting, feeling around until Cecil gasped and swore again. Carlos added two more fingers, one at a time, circling and stretching, so that Cecil ground back onto both forefingers and middle fingers.

Carlos pulled his head back as Cecil pushed down, releasing his cock.  
"You want this?"  
"Oh fuck yes!"  
"You want more?"  
"Mmm yes!"  
"I want you to fuck yourself on me. You want that?"  
Cecil nodded. He allowed Carlos to remove his fingers slowly then slid down the bed. Carlos put on a condom, lubed himself and held his cock at Cecil's entrance. Cecil pushed down slowly and held still. Carlos half sat, reached for Cecil and pulled him down into a kiss.  
"Oh babe I missed this. All of this. Fuck yourself real slow, take your time, I'll take care of you."  
Cecil rested both arms on Carlos's chest, crouching over slightly, and thrust slowly, adjusting position until every downwards thrust made him cry out in pleasure. Carlos thrust up in time with Cecil and reached one slippery hand between them to clasp Cecil's cock, holding it so that every thrust made it slide between his hand and his stomach.

Cecil's pace increased. Carlos increased pace to match until he felt the tingle of stimulation and desire increase to a hot buzz in his groin. Carlos gasped ragged breaths, thrusting harder but uncoordinated. Cecil held still and let Carlos fuck into him until he came with a panting cry and lay back breathing heavily, giggling and grinning. Cecil lifted his hips gradually and Carlos slipped slowly out. Carlos reached between them and grasped Cecil's cock, pumping it slowly, faster, then slowing again to match the spasms of Cecil's orgasm. Cecil lay forward on top of Carlos before rolling off to the side. They lay side by side, spent and smiling.

Carlos sighed. "We should get cleaned up."  
Cecil replied, "yeah."  
Carlos sniggered. "Want to share a shower? You know, to save water?"


	9. At home.

Carlos and Cecil emerged eventually from Carlos’s home. Where Carlos went, Cecil followed and where Cecil said he wanted to go, Carlos took him. Doug and Alicia arrived part way through what Cecil thought was his second week. 

After introductions, Doug commented in his quietest booming voice, “Aww you two're kinda cute, tiny and cute. Hey, Leesh, remember when I used to follow you everywhere and hold your hand when we had a really big battle until you asked me to let go ‘cause it spoiled your aim?”  
Alicia nodded and playfully punched Doug. Cecil thought they were smiling but the masks made it difficult to tell.

Doug and Alicia took Cecil and Carlos to see the sights. At the remains of the old settlements, Carlos showed Cecil where the Masked Army had excavated most of their building materials, scavenging so the new town was built partly with the ruins of the old. Carlos showed Cecil the mountain and the lighthouse, and Cecil insisted on climbing up himself just to delight in the idea that mountains were not only real, but tangible rather than an ignored haze on the horizon. Cecil looked in the picture frames, but turned away saying they made him uncomfortable like he was walking in on private moments.

Alicia and their dog carried Cecil and Carlos to the deep canyons, pointing out the desert plants, naming them and listing their uses. Cecil was not keen on delving too far down that spiral crack in the desert where painted symbols made him shiver. Between battles, Doug escorted them to the Masked Army camp for a meal of something Cecil was too polite to refuse and too respectful to inquire about, followed by what might have been singing. When it felt like night, although it was never dark, they watched the lights in the sky and dozed in a warm tangle of limbs.

To recover from several days of hiking and climbing and camping, and one worrisome day where Cecil disappeared completely but had no memory of it, Carlos took Cecil to the beach resort hotel for a spa break. It fell a little flat since none of the people who ran it were actually qualified for such dangerous pamper-work, but Cecil conceded it's the thought that counts. While they lay on sun-loungers, sipping home-made cocktails, they chatted. Cecil _hmm_ -ed and stretched.  
"This has been a wonderful vacation. Thank you, Carlos!"  
Carlos smiled, turned his head to look at Cecil and held his hand out, Cecil clasped it.  
"What has been your favourite thing here in the Otherworldly Desert Community?"  
"Oh I dunno," Cecil drawled. "Your apartment is pretty _neat."_  
Carlos sniggered. "Hmm," he stroked his chin. "I think we need to do some highly scientific experiments to find out what you like most about our apartment."  
Cecil grinned. "We can go do some science. You are, after all, a scientist."  
"Ha! In a while. I am comfortable here. What else do you like?"  
Cecil sat up a little to slurp his drink and settled back again. "The otherworldly desert is beautiful. I always called it a hellscape before, but it is not that at all. I will admit my opinion may have been somewhat _biased_ by the fact that you wanted to stay in the desert more than you wanted to come home to me."

Carlos got up to move his lounger closer to Cecil's. He lay on his side and stroked his boyfriend's face with a finger. "Oh Ceece, we talked this out so often already on the phone, you even asked me to stop calling so much! I wanted to come home to _you,_ help you through all this trouble with the Mayor, but..." Carlos sat up and waved a hand around. "You see what we could have here? I can walk around and nobody stares or points or whispers. People ask me stuff, I mean not _why are you here and when are you leaving_ but actual questions! Like _Hey neighbour, what's your name?_ Look at everything that is here, Cecil, honey," Carlos waved again at the sky and the town. He added softly, "and think about everything that is not here."

Cecil closed his eyes, reached for Carlos's touch again and thought. After a few minutes, he tugged at Carlos's hand.  
"Hey, take me home."

Carlos stood up, brushed down his clothes and helped Cecil up. He pulled Cecil into a brief hug and led him back into town. Cecil looked around at the buildings.  
"This isn't the way out to your apartment!"  
"No," Carlos agreed. "It is not. I want to show you something. Remember I said there was a surprise?"  
Cecil nodded. "Mmm. I like _some_ surprises."  
"I think you will like this surprise." Carlos laughed. "It's so exciting! I want to show you. I was going to wait until just before you had to go back to Night Vale, but I cannot wait any longer. It is near home, so I can show it to you then we can go home."  
"O-oh?" Cecil smiled. "I like that plan."

Soon Carlos pointed out a strange looking tent. As they walked closer, Cecil realised it was not a tent at all, it was a building covered with a patchwork of tarpaulins. It looked to Cecil like a rectangular version of one of the carnival tents from a months back, with gaudy tight-woven fabric that glistened in the light and draped from a single high point.  
"Carlos, is the surprise a carnival tent? Because if it is, I should warn you that carnivals are not--"  
"Well hey there, Cecil! Isn't this a wonderful surprise! I am just jazzed that you could visit our neighbourly little community. So, friend, tell me what you think! Isn't it just... _perfect?"_

Cecil whirled round to face Kevin and took a step back, colliding with Carlos.  
"You!... you're here. Okay. Uh... your shirt. What's that on your shirt? Those stains? Is it... tell me. Is it--"  
"Relax Cecil, it's only barbecue sauce!" Carlos breathed out a little laugh. "That's all, right Kevin? From that barbecue we all went to?"  
Kevin frowned. "Oh Carlos, I think... Oh! Carlos! Of course." He stretched out his widest smile. "Aren't you clever. Always thinking with that big head of yours. Cecil? Have you missed me as much as I have missed seeing you around? Oh we could be neighbours too. Wouldn't that just be so much _fun?"_  
Cecil took another step backwards and stood poised, waiting. "Uh... huh..."  
"I have such a surprise for you. We both do, don't we Carlos?" Kevin stepped forward. Cecil edged backward again. "May I show him? Carlos? Oh may I? Can I show you, Cecil? Can I show you what I did?" 

Carlos frowned and shook his head. "Not today, Kevin."  
Kevin's smile dropped a little. "Oh... you're _teasing_ him! You're going to make him guess what it is and if he guesses correctly... will you bring him back? Will you give him three guesses?" Kevin's smile ramped back up his face. "Oh, but what if he never guesses correctly! And I even decorated! Not as much as I did in Night Vale when we... U-uh--"  
"Enough, Kevin!" Carlos forced a laugh and stepped between Cecil and Kevin. "Cecil can see it when he's ready. That is not today." Carlos looked at the fresh browning stains on Kevin's shirt front. "No more barbecues. They are really not good for you. Ceece honey, I'll take you home."

Carlos put his arm around Cecil and led him away. He waited until Kevin was out of earshot, sitting in the sand in front of his building, watching them walk away. "You going to be okay?"  
Cecil nodded. "I am not a scientist, and yet I will be fine. It was a shock seeing him again. That's all. I knew he was here because he left me a message but someone being on the phone and someone actually being a physical reality, as far as I can tell, arouse very different feelings in me."  
Carlos sniggered. "Let's see what feelings we can arouse back home." Cecil tightened his grip around Carlos's waist for a second or two and smiled.

After a relaxing evening, or perhaps it was night, Cecil's phone buzzed. He opened his messages and sighed.  
"Carlos? I have to go now. My two weeks are over. I'd like to come back, though, as soon as I can get more vacation time."  
Carlos held Cecil tight. "I would like for you to come back." He kissed Cecil's forehead. "I would like that very much. Perhaps you could stay. Stay for longer."  
Cecil angled his head for a kiss on the lips. "I will certainly submit all the required paperwork, as soon as I can. Walk partway with me?"  
Carlos nodded. Cecil picked up his bag then dropped it again. "You know, if it's alright with you, I won't pack."  
Carlos laughed and stroked under Cecil's chin to bring his gaze level. "Leave it all here. You won't have to carry so much when you come back." 

They left Carlos's home half an hour later, hand in hand and smiling. Carlos was still smiling when he arrived back alone. He lay down on the side of the bed that was now Cecil's, hugged the pillow and thought about areas of space and stretches of time that he would prefer were occupied rather than vacant. 

When he woke, Carlos reached for his phone.


End file.
